The surface of what you don’t see

I take that quote from Throwing Muses’ Half Blast. It makes me think of the dragonfly. Dragonfly symbolism is centered on deep thoughts rising to the surface and and paying attention to those thoughts… I like to also think about it the opposite way, too. To dive through that surface and soar through everything underneath. There’s ALWAYS more to the story.

Take Day Glo, for example. This was my favorite of the songs that were coming out around then. It wasn’t until years later that I really felt the depth of that song. I identify with it now on a level I never did. For me, it’s a very, very sad song. It describes how I feel sometimes to a T. “then you melt into the background” “adding injury to your insult”. When I feel low, I melt into the background, withdraw from people, then no one seems to notice, which makes the initial feelings all that much more worse. My rational mind knows this is complete bullshit, that people *may* notice but they are also living their own lives. It’s hard sometimes, in this distributed world we live in, with our friends all over the place. But we all feel crappy about ourselves sometimes. That’s why it’s important to recognize that when we’re NOT feeling crappy, so we can try to remember that these feelings are often unwarranted and get over ourselves.

I don’t mean for this to be a self-help post, but hey, that digression just happened. Day Glo, though, is such a good example of what I mean. It can crush me if I listen to it when I’m sad. When I’m my usual self? I can hear it and love it like I did that first day. I can hear it and feel it’s pain, but not experience it. I think that’s a good thing to be able to do.

“Come outside…… look at these crazy stars!” How amazing is it when you really SEE something? Not just *seeing* it like, “oh, OK, stars. yay.”, but really, REALLY noticing it, “HOLY FUCK! those RULE!” I love when music hits me like the latter. It can be real intense, too, which brings to mind Quick. That’s going to have to be a whole blog post in itself, since I relate that song to a Hindu goddess. I don’t think I’ve discussed that here yet, but oh, the *genius* in that song. It’s quite powerful.

I think my point of this post is really that these songs do tend to show their deep underbelly over time. You may not see it until you need it, either, and you’ve gotta be able to open yourself up to them. The songs are smart. They know their message is wasted until you need to hear it. I’m always so honored when they DO decide to show me what’s beneath the surface. These songs are better friends than real people are, most of the time. They reveal bits of themselves when you need them. They commiserate, they bond, they comfort. They morph and change but stay true to their message. Makes me wonder about what else these songs have to give. I never just listen. I feel.

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